


Phases

by lgbthozier



Category: Ant-Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Domestic Fluff, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Marriage Proposal, Other, Post-Canon, Pre-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Reader-Insert, may be female coded sorry, no dusting in this!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-17
Updated: 2019-05-17
Packaged: 2020-03-06 16:51:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18855118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lgbthozier/pseuds/lgbthozier
Summary: All Ava wanted was to hold you, to wrap you up in her arms and never let go. She wanted to run her fingers across your skin, and hold your hand, and kiss you all over. She wanted to feel like a normal person, doing things that the couples she saw on television or out on the streets had done. But instead she could only phase right through you, and it was so frustrating, so annoying.—————there’s not enough love for ava starr in this world. also this is very old, forgive me





	Phases

**Author's Note:**

> for all my socials please go here —> https://ameliapanics.carrd.co/

Everything hurt.   
Ava lived her whole life like this, phasing and spying and being used as a weapon. There was never an easy day. There was no break, no way to take her foot off the gas pedal, to shift gears and turn things back to when she could have had a normal childhood, a normal life.   
Funny that she uses this metaphor, when she can’t even drive a fucking car for long without phasing through it. She is the embodiment of hot lava melting through flesh, with a temper to match.   
And then there was you.   
In a sea of uncertainty, you were the life preserver that floated your way to her, a beacon of safety among chaotic waves. Despite all the pain, at the end of the day, Ava knew that there was you, an angel sent by a god that she no longer believed in. Somehow, your presence made things just a little bit easier. Maybe because she never imagined falling for someone after the hellish journey she’s had. Or maybe it was because you took a chance with her, despite the harm she’s caused countless people in her wake.    
In all honesty, Ava had Bill to thank for meeting you. You were a brilliant student that had attended his classes, and in turn you became a good friend of his, so much so that he trusted you to help him with Ava’s condition. Ava was terrified, at first; who did you think you were, walking around with that effortless smile on your face, like things were going to be so much better just because you barged into her life?    
She was ashamed to admit it, at first, but that’s exactly what happened. The only time she found some peace was when you were by her side, just talking to her, telling her funny stories about your life and reminding Ava of what it was like to really be alive. This, she thought, is right where she wanted to be, by your side with nothing to fear. She was scarily vulnerable around you, but something about that fact was liberating.   
However, being vulnerable felt like a fucking disaster sometimes.    
All Ava wanted was to hold you, to wrap you up in her arms and never let go. She wanted to run her fingers across your skin, and hold your hand, and kiss you all over. She wanted to feel like a normal person, doing things that the couples she saw on television or out on the streets had done. But instead she could only phase right through you, and it was so frustrating, so annoying. Ava starved for your touch, but every time she seemed to get ahold of herself, she phased again, and the lava came bubbling over in hot, angry tears down her face.   
“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” you whispered.   
“No it’s not,” she spat. “I hurt everyday of my life and you’re the one good thing to come out of it, but I can’t even touch you without ruining everything. Not giving you the affection you deserve hurts more than an infinite number of my worst days like this.”   
You tear up at her confession, softly shaking your head. “I don’t need you to touch me to feel your love.” Slowly, you reach out to hold her hand, watching Ava flinch when she phases, before whispering words of encouragement as she calmed down enough to hold you for a moment.   
“There’s no one on this planet that I love more than you. We’ll get through this, I promise.” Ava nodded, using her other hand to wipe away stray tears.   
With you, everything felt possible.   
  
When Janet Van Dyne returned from the quantum realm, Ava had intended to hurt the woman; it was something both you and Bill had warned her not to do, though her days were numbered. It hurt to see her like this, a twister barreling through the city without a care for who it affects. It hurt even more when you sided with Bill, and there was so much hurt in her eyes, but she refused to listen to you this time.    
Ava almost succeeded in her plan. Luckily, Hope Pym and Scott Lang came by to stop her, and when Janet and her husband returned, the older woman took pity on Ava. Something had happened in that realm, something that allowed her to heal Ava, at least temporarily. You saw the wave of emotions crash over the woman you loved as she stared down at herself, no longer phasing; for the first time in years, Ava was stable.    
After that, the three of you were forced to go into hiding while Janet and her family worked together to discover what exactly went down in the quantum realm. Luckily, Hank was kind enough to craft a cottage that could size down if need be. Nestled comfortably in the woods, you and Ava finally had a chance to settle down a bit.    
On some evenings, Bill would leave to have a talk with Hank and Janet about Ava’s condition — so far, nothing definitive had been deduced, but Bill’s visits were becoming more frequent, so you took it as a good sign. Ava always seemed increasingly anxious during the times he left, though, for a good reason. She saw him as a father figure, so of course she would be worried that he might be discovered. Hank made sure to give them plenty of protection, and no matter how often you told her this, she seemed to still feel uneasy during the trips. You took to cradling her in your arms and rubbing soothing circles into her back during those times, sometimes with earbuds in and soft music playing to calm her down. It seemed to work just about every time she got worked up.   
Today, though, you were the anxious one.    
She wasn’t sure what to do or say. For nearly a week you had been just a tad on edge about something, and it started after you had left one day to “get something important” with Hope’s help. Ava tried asking you about it many times, but you always waved it off and said you’d explain later. It was beginning to scare the woman, and she ached for an answer from you.   
Suddenly, after the three of you had dinner, Bill cleared his throat and stood up from the dining table. “Hank and Janet asked me to stay at the lab tonight to help them run some tests. It’ll be just you two, is that alright?” Something was off about his tone, but Ava couldn’t fathom what exactly it was, so she simply nodded her head as you did. “See you tomorrow, Bill. Stay safe,” you said, and he shot you both a smile before he left.   
  
“Marry me,” you whispered, knelt down in front of her with her hands in yours, trembling slightly.    
Ava’s eyes widened in surprise, a million different thoughts clouding her head and emptying out of her eyes. She hadn’t realized how long she had been sitting there, too stunned to speak, until you smiled thoughtfully up at Ava.    
“You can say no, Ava. We can take our time.” The look in your eyes told the woman that you really would be fine regardless of the outcome; all the love in your heart outweighed any of the anxiety that stemmed from a possible rejection.   
But Ava shook her head fervently at that, exclaiming, “No! No, I... I want to marry you. I want to be with you. Please.” The tears just kept flowing out of her eyes like Niagara Falls, and you let out a breathy laugh and smiled when you, too, started to cry.    
“I love you more than anything.”


End file.
